This is my 'things I want to complain about' blog...
1) Here's a really easy way to get on my bad side: flake out on me last minute. I have ZERO tolerance for these kinds of people. I have probably 2 people who flake on me who I consider friends, but that's only because they have redeemed themselves on an unreachable level. If you flake out on my last minute with no warning, expect to become very distant from me. I don't like it. I don't appreciate it. And I sure as hell give as much notice as I can if I ever have to "flake out."
2) You smokers stink up my whole learning environment and I think its the RUDEST thing ever! You smell soooooooo bad! Its so freaking distracting. There seriously should be a "smoking" section of a classroom or lecture hall because ya'll don't realize how your stink spreads. It's fucking disgusting.
3) Pull your head out of your perfumed ass and realize that you're not going anywhere in life when you act like that. I don't sympathize with you. Swallow the tear, grow a pair and take responsibility for you actions.
4) It's called STUDYING for a reason. Stfu and do it already!
5) If you want to be in the medical profession and you can't understand how vital Medical Terminology is for your career, you are going to get EATEN ALIVE!
6) COMPLETE disregard for the plans we had! I know I am across the country, but when you make plans to skype me, you either keep them or you tell me BEFORE our meeting time...NOT AT OUR MEETING TIME, WHEN I HAVE SAT DOWN AND LOGGED IN WAITING FOR YOU. I'm taking the time to stick to the plans because I want to see you and I DON'T APPRECIATE BEING BLOWN OFF.
7) DON'T BLOW ME OFF!
Obviously, I'm upset.
Monday, August 30, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Fear.
This summer has been good for me. I've been through a lot of ups and downs, all with the perspective of myself. It's appropriate that I started off my days reading a book titled "The Last Time I Was Me." I always have much more personal growth in the summer, something I think I can blame on my firey Sagittarian birth day.
One theme of the whole summer has been my ability to feel comfortable alone. This was ultimately the loneliest summer in Honey History. I've been living completely on my own the whole time, had no best friend in my town, had to make a whole new group of friends, and force myself to get past my hesitation and leap into the unknown. It's quite possibly been thing that could have ever happened to me.
Today I realized that my fear of being alone is gone. I don't have the sickness in my stomach anymore. Although, I will admit that it's not something I see in my near future, I would accept it. Putting myself in a hypothetical situation, I can actually visualize looking forward to it because of some of the positive things I have experienced this summer.
I finally feel independent. I feel like I have many outlets and not just one anymore. If one outlet blew, the others would back me up. It took a lonely summer to figure it out, and I am so glad it happened.
I've continuously been in a relationship the past 6 and a half years (not with the same person). People always told me, "You need time to be alone and be by yourself." I never really understood why. I get it, now. It's not a bad thing. Its making time to love yourself and enjoy yourself so that when someone else wants to enjoy YOU, YOU wont be an issue.
I just have a lot of thoughts going through my head right now. I can sense that my future is changing. Something is going to happen (if it already hasn't) and the wind in my sails is about to change. I have prepared and I have trained and I will face my challenge head on with a strength I didn't have before.
Don't be afraid. Just do it.
One theme of the whole summer has been my ability to feel comfortable alone. This was ultimately the loneliest summer in Honey History. I've been living completely on my own the whole time, had no best friend in my town, had to make a whole new group of friends, and force myself to get past my hesitation and leap into the unknown. It's quite possibly been thing that could have ever happened to me.
Today I realized that my fear of being alone is gone. I don't have the sickness in my stomach anymore. Although, I will admit that it's not something I see in my near future, I would accept it. Putting myself in a hypothetical situation, I can actually visualize looking forward to it because of some of the positive things I have experienced this summer.
I finally feel independent. I feel like I have many outlets and not just one anymore. If one outlet blew, the others would back me up. It took a lonely summer to figure it out, and I am so glad it happened.
I've continuously been in a relationship the past 6 and a half years (not with the same person). People always told me, "You need time to be alone and be by yourself." I never really understood why. I get it, now. It's not a bad thing. Its making time to love yourself and enjoy yourself so that when someone else wants to enjoy YOU, YOU wont be an issue.
I just have a lot of thoughts going through my head right now. I can sense that my future is changing. Something is going to happen (if it already hasn't) and the wind in my sails is about to change. I have prepared and I have trained and I will face my challenge head on with a strength I didn't have before.
Don't be afraid. Just do it.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
If my life were Harry Potter...
If my life were Harry Potter, Voldemort just decided to stop his nonsense and become Ghandi.
Do you know how good that feels? To feel the relief? The joy? The understanding? To feel the anger and frustration leave my body? I don't think I have felt this good about moving on from something ever!
I may have been last on the list and it may have been a text message I wish I could frame, but it doesn't matter. The only thing that does is that it happened and it was there and I am taking it as it is. Who can complain about that?
I feel light as a feather...like I finally feel complete. I can finally feel happy. It's so ridiculous and totally retarded that I needed such validation...but who ever said it was easy?
I am so thankful. :) I wish all of you the same feelings I feel today.
Do you know how good that feels? To feel the relief? The joy? The understanding? To feel the anger and frustration leave my body? I don't think I have felt this good about moving on from something ever!
I may have been last on the list and it may have been a text message I wish I could frame, but it doesn't matter. The only thing that does is that it happened and it was there and I am taking it as it is. Who can complain about that?
I feel light as a feather...like I finally feel complete. I can finally feel happy. It's so ridiculous and totally retarded that I needed such validation...but who ever said it was easy?
I am so thankful. :) I wish all of you the same feelings I feel today.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
A way to bring money into your life!
Hey guys! I wanted to share something. It's taken me a few months to really get into it, but I believe it works! My mom taught me this, and now I am going to teach you!
This is a method used to bring money into your life. So far, its worked pretty well for me. Call what you want, but this really works! You have to believe in it!
Here's what you do:
You check out all the dollar bills you have (just ones). There will be a number on each like the ones circled here:
This is a number 11. Each dollar bill is numbered from 1-12. Your job is to find these through collecting and paying for stuff in cash. You cannot receive these from someone who knows this method, you must EARN them! 12 is the easiest to find. 3s, 8s, and I think 10s are hardest.
Once you've collected all 12, fold them up in order and store them in your wallet or purse so you don't use them. Their energy will bring you money! Try it for yourself and tell me what you think! :)
This is a method used to bring money into your life. So far, its worked pretty well for me. Call what you want, but this really works! You have to believe in it!
Here's what you do:
You check out all the dollar bills you have (just ones). There will be a number on each like the ones circled here:
This is a number 11. Each dollar bill is numbered from 1-12. Your job is to find these through collecting and paying for stuff in cash. You cannot receive these from someone who knows this method, you must EARN them! 12 is the easiest to find. 3s, 8s, and I think 10s are hardest.
Once you've collected all 12, fold them up in order and store them in your wallet or purse so you don't use them. Their energy will bring you money! Try it for yourself and tell me what you think! :)
Friday, August 6, 2010
Evil.
I've lost this battle. I cannot do it anymore.
It was easy to think you could become insignificant to me. It was harder to actually treat it that way. I've pushed you out of my life as far as I could possibly reach hoping that one day all would cease to exist. I was hoping that maybe one day, everything would go away and apologies would be exchanged. Neither of those days has yet to come.
Instead of the situation ceasing to exist, some friends of mine have ceased to exist in my life. And a part of my relationship has ceased to exist. I've been pretending too long and been fighting too hard. It's unnecessary. It's exhausting. And I frankly cannot do it anymore.
You are not in my life and yet you still find a way to ruin it. It's like you've strategically planted a bomb and I can hear the ticking to detonation but the bomb is no where to be found. How do I rid myself of your evil? How many times must I cleanse? For how long do I have to campaign myself to my friends? For how long must the issue linger over my head in my relationship? What price do I have to pay to make you disappear? Why, in the first place, is it my price to pay?
You've turned people against me and for what cost to you? To make yourself look worthy? To win the body count? Well then, you've won. You've topped me. There is no longer a need to compete because there is no competing with you. You worm your way into everything and somehow come out successful in nearly everything you do. How is that? I have the hardest time wondering how anyone could see you in a good eye. You're murky. You're in slim light. You're true colors sometimes show but they are quickly covered with empty words. You're a shadow of a man.
I hold so much anger and frustration because of you. You make my life so difficult and I am so ready to see you leave this continent. To not walk on the same soil as you will be so relieving. But, alas, upon your return this will all resume because that's how you are. Evil.
And that says a lot, because I didn't believe in evil until I saw you.
It was easy to think you could become insignificant to me. It was harder to actually treat it that way. I've pushed you out of my life as far as I could possibly reach hoping that one day all would cease to exist. I was hoping that maybe one day, everything would go away and apologies would be exchanged. Neither of those days has yet to come.
Instead of the situation ceasing to exist, some friends of mine have ceased to exist in my life. And a part of my relationship has ceased to exist. I've been pretending too long and been fighting too hard. It's unnecessary. It's exhausting. And I frankly cannot do it anymore.
You are not in my life and yet you still find a way to ruin it. It's like you've strategically planted a bomb and I can hear the ticking to detonation but the bomb is no where to be found. How do I rid myself of your evil? How many times must I cleanse? For how long do I have to campaign myself to my friends? For how long must the issue linger over my head in my relationship? What price do I have to pay to make you disappear? Why, in the first place, is it my price to pay?
You've turned people against me and for what cost to you? To make yourself look worthy? To win the body count? Well then, you've won. You've topped me. There is no longer a need to compete because there is no competing with you. You worm your way into everything and somehow come out successful in nearly everything you do. How is that? I have the hardest time wondering how anyone could see you in a good eye. You're murky. You're in slim light. You're true colors sometimes show but they are quickly covered with empty words. You're a shadow of a man.
I hold so much anger and frustration because of you. You make my life so difficult and I am so ready to see you leave this continent. To not walk on the same soil as you will be so relieving. But, alas, upon your return this will all resume because that's how you are. Evil.
And that says a lot, because I didn't believe in evil until I saw you.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
California girls, we're undeniable ;)
So what's new with me? Well a whole damn lot, that's for sure!
This previous Monday, I got a tutoring gig for a maternity class. Here's the thing: I have never taken a maternity class, Ha! My friend hooked me up so that I can unofficially take this class while simultaneously tutor it. It's actually quite grand! I am enjoying every minute of it...as I want to be a midwife when I "grow up!" Its Monday, Tuesday and Thursday from 8am-3pm for 2 weeks, so its already half way over! Sort of depressing...
Speaking of tutoring, I got my hours worked out with my professor again for the fall. I wont be tutoring as much Anatomy as I would like, but I've got some Physio hours, some more maternity hours, and I picked up a few hours reviewing Anatomy and Physiology with the Nursing students. Again...with that friend who hooks me up. ;)
At work, I am working between 35-40 hours a week. Sort of crazy exhausting, but its money and textbooks are expensive. Plus, Gio's is sort of fun. I enjoy messing around with all the co workers so it isn't too terrible. The tips have been great as there are lots of large order for companies and camps. No complaints there. Minus the fact my car has been giving me mild panic attacks because the "CHECK ENGINE" light comes on randomly. Yeah, RANDOMLY!
In the most important news, I started my belly dancing class today! It is FABULOUS! I will definitely be taking more classes with Alexandra. She is wonderful and I really dig her. We're working on American Tribal Style right now and we will be having a performance in December! Her advanced classes are coming up at UCSB and I hope to take those later in the fall. I've got a Serpentine video coming done by Rachel Brice that I hope to get me more prepared for the advanced ATS class. SO STOKED!
I really wish I could make it back to Tahoe before summer is over. I can't believe I start school so soon from now. It's already the 5th of August?! I don't believe it. Crap. That means I have bills to pay...
Busy, busy, busy! My life isn't filled with so much knitting anymore...it makes me sad. But belly dancing is opening me up again! I was on such a high after class tonight...all the zills and the moves and the music! I just feel like this fire was reignited within me! Even after just one class, I can feel totally different about myself. I feel increases in my confidence, my energy, my happiness...no wonder I have been so depressed these two years! I am finally taking the initiative and doing something for myself. Any of ya'll who can't keep up, well you will be left to eat my dust. :)
Ciao!
P.S. Check my Youtube channel for some of my random tid bits! :)
http://www.youtube.com/user/hunibuni121507
This previous Monday, I got a tutoring gig for a maternity class. Here's the thing: I have never taken a maternity class, Ha! My friend hooked me up so that I can unofficially take this class while simultaneously tutor it. It's actually quite grand! I am enjoying every minute of it...as I want to be a midwife when I "grow up!" Its Monday, Tuesday and Thursday from 8am-3pm for 2 weeks, so its already half way over! Sort of depressing...
Speaking of tutoring, I got my hours worked out with my professor again for the fall. I wont be tutoring as much Anatomy as I would like, but I've got some Physio hours, some more maternity hours, and I picked up a few hours reviewing Anatomy and Physiology with the Nursing students. Again...with that friend who hooks me up. ;)
At work, I am working between 35-40 hours a week. Sort of crazy exhausting, but its money and textbooks are expensive. Plus, Gio's is sort of fun. I enjoy messing around with all the co workers so it isn't too terrible. The tips have been great as there are lots of large order for companies and camps. No complaints there. Minus the fact my car has been giving me mild panic attacks because the "CHECK ENGINE" light comes on randomly. Yeah, RANDOMLY!
In the most important news, I started my belly dancing class today! It is FABULOUS! I will definitely be taking more classes with Alexandra. She is wonderful and I really dig her. We're working on American Tribal Style right now and we will be having a performance in December! Her advanced classes are coming up at UCSB and I hope to take those later in the fall. I've got a Serpentine video coming done by Rachel Brice that I hope to get me more prepared for the advanced ATS class. SO STOKED!
I really wish I could make it back to Tahoe before summer is over. I can't believe I start school so soon from now. It's already the 5th of August?! I don't believe it. Crap. That means I have bills to pay...
Busy, busy, busy! My life isn't filled with so much knitting anymore...it makes me sad. But belly dancing is opening me up again! I was on such a high after class tonight...all the zills and the moves and the music! I just feel like this fire was reignited within me! Even after just one class, I can feel totally different about myself. I feel increases in my confidence, my energy, my happiness...no wonder I have been so depressed these two years! I am finally taking the initiative and doing something for myself. Any of ya'll who can't keep up, well you will be left to eat my dust. :)
Ciao!
P.S. Check my Youtube channel for some of my random tid bits! :)
http://www.youtube.com/user/hunibuni121507
Sunday, August 1, 2010
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